From the SFGate:

Apparently not much:

Sequence of events:

1. Driver locates prime parking spot, which is metered and therefore approximately 80% larger than his vehicle
2. Driver approaches the spot at a stunningly bad angle, but manages to pull in thanks to the insanely large nature of the space
3. Driver attempts to straighten out by pulling forward
4. Driver completes straightening out maneuver by backing up at a bizarrely high speed
5. Driver slams into the car behind him with a crash audible from at least a block away
6. Driver inexplicably moves forward until he is within one inch of the car in front, and well outside the bounds of his enormous parking space
7. Driver makes a weak karmic gesture by inspecting the bumper of the car behind him. He does not leave a note.

craigslist gems of the week:

• I am a late 20’s professional male looking for a cute girl to live in my 3 bedroom flat in North Beach and cook, clean and massage.
• NO FUCKING DRUGS, no PETS no VEGANS OR SMOKERS welcome please , I am open very easy going
• I’m a recently widowed, liberal, open-minded, bisexual, 33 year young, financially set, female who lives the alternate nudist/exhibitionist lifestyle … the only light duties that you will be required to do in exchange for FREE RENT living here are things like taking out the trash, skimming the pool, sweeping the garage, and driving my deceased husband’s Porsche 911 (which is parked in the garage) to keep the engine and tires in good condition.
• No pets, no republicans
• Rental range from $l,600 to $2,200 per month (suiting particular arrangements and perks) …This situation hosts quiet private accommodation for a guest, attached to a house with gracious (straight) gentlemen present
• You must be environmentally friendly and must NOT be a Bush supporter!
• $750 large room for rent girl only [funny only if you consider the colloquial definition of “rent boy” and imagine a gender swap]

Spotted in a dining establishment near my office:

1) An official notice of San Francisco’s ordinance requiring all employers to provide paid sick leave for full-time, part-time, and temporary employees.

2) A partially full bottle of prescription cough syrup (complete with codeine!) directly below the sign.

But this review:

I was delighted when my industry peer suggested meeting at [unnamed café]

leaves me wondering whether all the patrons talk like corporate automatons.

Damn Yelp.

• One hike
• Four cities
• Two families
• Two long-lost high school friends
• One very spicy New Mexican restaurant
• Two movies, one mediocre and one quite funny
• Two musicals, one a traditional holiday favorite and one not
• Three instances of traditional pre- and post-Christmas shopping
• One set of holiday cookies, including a bloodshot eye and a Rastafarian candy cane
• Two train trips, one spanning 6 states and one so narrowly missed it merits its own post

This girl has crossed the bay.

I now live in a charming 400 square foot studio in San Francisco. Why? Well, no matter how rad Oakland is - and I have a 23-post blog category to prove it - there is simply more to do in San Francisco. For a chronic insomniac living alone without a car, that’s a major bonus. My new place is within minutes of dozens of cafés, restaurants, and shops, many of which are open 24 hours a day. You can travel a few blocks east to get your couture fix, or a few blocks south to get your smack on. There is also an excellent 24-hour Indian restaurant down the street. In short, there is no end to the possibilities for addictive behavior. Stay tuned as I weigh my options.

If you are wondering what in the hell that post title means, 510 is the East Bay area code. The intercom system at my building requires a 415, so I had to change my number. If you want it, email me at janna [at] projectjanna [dot] com. Incidentally, I might also need yours, so include that in the email. I lost my phone last night, which resulted in my maneuvering around the amorphous mass of boxes in my new place for over an hour, desperately hoping it was actually in the apartment instead of in the hands of someone with a bunch of relatives in another country. No luck. I only managed to cut myself on a broken glass in one of the boxes. In the end, though, all is good. I now have an awesome pink phone that I have christened “Cellular Barbie.”

Next up on Project Janna? Pictures of the 47 or so bruises I collected while packing and moving; things overheard at 3 AM on my first night in San Francisco; and adventures in Bay Area real estate.